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GODDAMN HISTORIANS! part 1: Around & Around -- The Plan

2/27/2015

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Part 1:  Around and Around – The Plan

When the saloon door burst open Orin the bartender cautioned The Kid, “Don’t look.  Thems historians.”

Cautiously, The Kid spun an eye around the filthy den called Rose’s Thorn.  A dim hole infested with the dregs of society:  smugglers, black market antiquarians, and worst of the worst historians.

To keep the timeline on track, The Kid whispered, “Who are they?”

Orin said, “The one eyed grizzly is Seamus Goldberg -- Irish Jew.  Jumped back 88 times to kill Hitler 88 different ways.”

Seamus growled at five men sitting in a corner table.  The five vacated.  One tried to leave with their whiskey.  Seamus snatched the bottle, loosening the man’s grip with a head butt.  The Kid flinched.  The trio took seats.

Orin went on, “The woman is Katie Jackson.  They call her Katie Extinction.  She the reason Gandhi killed so many.”

Hearing the name Gandhi, a refugee from 1940s London shivered, muttered a prayer, and downed a tumbler of gin.  He gestured for a refill.  Orin obliged.  He knew the stories about the madman Mahatma.  Those were enough to cause nightmares.

Orin finished the lineup, “One with his back to the exit that’s the Professor.”

The Kid nodded, “I heard of him.  First fella to wrangle a Phantom Filament.”

Orin said, “With his bare hands, if you believe the stories.”

The Kid slugged back his whiskey, “I don’t, but that don’t mean it ain’t true.”

The Kid sauntered over to the trio.  Orin hissed a warning.  The Kid ignored him.  

Without turning around the Professor said, “First time we had this conversation Seamus broke your jaw.  Second time Katie broke ya arm, stabbed you in the neck with the bone.”

The Kid smiled, “Third time’s a charm.”

“No, it isn’t.”  The Professor turned, raised a gun, and shot The Kid in the chest.  

# 

The Kid smiled, “Lucky thirteen.”

The Professor chuckled, “Take a seat.”

Sitting down, The Kid reached for the whiskey bottle.  Katie grabbed it first, and smashed it against the wall.  The bar went silent.  Orin ran over with a fresh bottle.  

“On the house,” he said.

Katie laughed, “When do we ever pay?”

Seamus growled, “Di tsayt iz tayerer fun gelt.” 

Katie sneered, “Don’t be getting on that shit road.”

Seamus shrugged, “I figured something smart before we got stupid.”

The Professor looked up at Orin, “You still here?”

Orin hurried off.  He shot a look at The Kid who just grinned.  Orin shook his head.  The bar went back to a low, uneasy murmur – everyone ignoring the corner table, while keeping nervous eyes on it.

The Professor pulled a cigarette from a case.  He tapped it against the ornate Art Deco design etched across the surface, a gift from F. Scott Fitzgerald for regularly supplying Zelda with antipsychotics.  The Professor didn’t do it for the writer though.  He did for, as he saw her, the first American flapper.  All the dominoes followed her lead.

Threading the coffin nail between his lips the Professor said, “So, Kid, as I understand it you want us to help you pull some kind of heist.”

“Across time.”

“No shit.” -- Katie rolled her eyes.  Seamus grunted what might've been a laugh.

The Kid said, “Look.  We already had this conversation.”

The Professor blew a cloud of pale blue into the air.  Watching for shapes he said, “Ad nauseam, and I don’t care to have it ad infinitum.”

“Then why are we talking?”

Seamus snorted, “Because killing you, beating you into pulp just don’t seem to send the message.”

Katie grabbed The Kid’s ear and hollered into it, “We ain’t interested.”

She shoved him away, and The Kid chuckled.  This caused the Professor to cock an eyebrow.  He couldn’t get a read on this one.  That alone was unusual, however, despite his best efforts the Professor had been unable to track down whichever Resurrection Men kept bringing The Kid back to life.  This more than anything else inspired the desire to get to know the young man better.

At a glance The Kid seemed to be merely twenty years old, a wondrous amalgamation of self assured confidence and horizon grasping ambition unaffected by years of real world experience.  In other words, a self proclaimed Titan not yet aware of its own fragility, or the withering fact of its own limited proportions.  In ripped jeans, leather jacket, and a middle finger T-shirt, The Kid came across as more cliché than genuine rebel; his appearance in stark contrast to the Professor’s own waistcoat and matching pinstriped pants. 

Of course, looks didn’t mean everything.  Seamus lumbered around in greasy cargo pants and sleeveless t-shirts featuring cartoon characters, while Katie wore anything leather like some pseudo-futuristic primitive, one eye shadowed in electric blue.  The Professor didn’t recall a negative opinion of them when they first met, although their reputations told him more than enough.  This Kid, though, had no rep.  

The Professor remarked, “It’s not a bad idea…”

“Thank you,” The Kid said.

“It’s the worst idea.”

“Ever,” Seamus grunted.

Katie added, “Let me ask you something.  Was somebody fucking your brain when you came up with this?  Good ol’ fashion dick lobotomy.”

Seamus said, “That would explain things.”

Katie agreed, “It definitely would.”

The Kid forced a smile, “This can be done.  It isn’t easy, but with the right crew it can be done.”

The Professor said, “Assuming you can even track down the phantom filament we’d need.”   

Leaning forward The Kid whispered, “I already have.”

Katie glanced at the Professor then Seamus.  The Hebrew from Howth poured The Kid a drink.  Katie leaned back, arms folded across her chest.  The Professor gestured for The Kid to go on.

“It wasn’t easy, and I’m not sayin’ that just to brag.”  -- he pulled out a small tablet, and opened a file – “There she is.”

The Kid handed the tablet over to the Professor.

“I’ll be damned.”

The trio examined the information on screen.  According to the file The Kid had indeed found a reality where Martians existed, and had developed trade relations with Earth thanks to Civil Rights advocate Richard Nixon.  Seamus shook his head.

He said, “This could be more fun than when we faked Vincent’s death.”

“Vincent?” The Kid asked.

“Van Gogh,” Katie said.

“You faked Van Gogh’s death?”

Without taking his eyes off the file the Professor said, “He’s on a farm in Australia sucking down a steady stream of antidepressants.”

Katie added, “He paints his greatest hits for us any time we need cash.  It’s not exactly forgery.”

The Professor spotted something in the filament.  Pointing he said, “Shouldn’t be hard to move this into reality, but the second we do alarms are going to go off.”

“That’s the beauty.  We don’t have to be in it for very long.”

Seamus said, “Assuming things go smoothly.”

“Or what you're after even exists,” The Professor added.

The Kid said, “I’ve done the research.”

Katie fired down a shot, “Don’t mean dick.  Alternate histories aren’t always accurate.  We tried to steal Oscar Wilde’s laptop.  Long story short, he wasn’t a writer in that world.”

“Point is,” The Professor brought things back into focus, “Phantom filaments are more full of implication than fact.  We go in for something specific, it might not be there.”

“Might not be the way you want it to be,” Seamus added.

Leaning back in his chair The Kid grinned, “Ain’t the risk part of the fun?”

The Professor narrowed his eyes.  What he disliked most about this plan pertained to the end game.  The previous few times The Kid told them the plan he always left off the final move.  Fact of the matter being, the trio hadn’t made it this far taking reckless chances.  So he said:

“We wrangle the filament, and then what?  All you’ve ever said is we get paid.”

Call it paranoia, but The Kid suspected if he gave up all the details the trio would simply cut him out of the job.  With the plan in hand they wouldn’t really need him.  However, he figured any reticence on his part wouldn't help things either.  There was a bigger picture to consider.  He just needed to set things in motion.

The Kid said, “We sell Martian weapons to Charlie Manson and the Jonestown cult.” 

COMING SOON!

PART 2:  A MESSY WEB

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In Mitch's Hole the Rats are at War

2/21/2015

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A quick word to the reader:

The following is an excerpt from an ongoing transmedia project currently in the works.  This is just a taste of what's to come.  However, I wanted to take a moment to point out the inspiration for this segment. 

The story portion below is inspired by Henry Darger who wrote Into the Realms of the Unreal, a 15, 145 page book.  The majority of the book involves a story entitled The Story of the Vivian Girls, in What is Known as the Realms of the Unreal, of the Glandeco-Angelinian War Storm Caused by the Child Slave Rebellion.  The tale of Henry Darger and the Vivian Girls is an engrossing, heartbreaking saga in and of itself, and I whole heartedly encourage you to take a little time to glance at the links below as well as do your own research.

As I said, the story here inspired by this work is only a segment of a much larger narrative, so stay tuned to find out how it all unfolds.

For more on Henry Darger, start your own investigation here:

Henry Darger - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

henry darger - Bing

...and now...

IN MITCH'S HOLE THE RATS ARE AT WAR

Last night Mitch put his eye to the hole in the wall.  He noticed it the day he moved into the apartment, but paid it little mind.  The previous tenant probably caused it any of a hundred different ways, and though he noticed it every day for six months, Mitch found ignoring the hole much easier than fixing it.  Then one midnight, on his way to the bathroom, Mitch thought he saw a light coming from the hole.  

He shook off the sight as a mistake.  Probably some light from the street outside, or maybe just a bit of dream hanging in his eye.  Either way, the light vanished in a blink.  He might not’ve given the matter a second thought except another night, not two later, he saw the light again.  This time there could be no denying the shimmering column streaming out of the hole.

Cautiously, Mitch waved a hand across the shaft, a kaleidoscopic array of shapes cast into his palm.  He could even feel the patterns moving across his hand, an iridescent mandala of playing card patterns, aces chasing spades followed by diamonds and hearts.  He shook his head.  Didn’t his buddy Gene once tell him some drugs stay in a person’s system – Mitch felt certain he’d heard as much from someone who could be considered a legitimate opinion – of course, some of the acid he did back in college probably hid out in his bones, and cracking his neck earlier released a flood of dormant LSD-25 into his system.  After all, nothing except a vacant lot existed behind this wall.

Mitch moved to glance inside, but the light hit him in the eye like a fierce wind full of icy specs.  Flinching away from the view he turned back to find nothing there.  Nothing save for the hole. 

Three weeks went by.  Some nights he saw the light, others just inky darkness.  During the day he tried examining the hole, yet it seemed to be merely a crooked circle crudely cut into the wall.  Shining a flashlight inside revealed wood, wiring, and one or two pipes, everything ordinary, everything Mitch expected.  

The first few times the light resurfaced Mitch didn’t know what to do.  He tried to ignore it, but couldn’t.  In fact, the more he tried not to see it the more it seemed to shine, brighter and more frequently, faint noises accompanying it almost seeming to call to him.  Then last night, Mitch's curiosity became so intense he pulled on an old scuba mask he had, and peered into the hole.

He could feel the light pushing against the viewing glass.  Again like a strong wind, though now he could stare into the column.  Mitch’s heart skipped a beat.  

Through the hole he saw a legion of bipedal rats riding cats across a purple prairie towards an advancing army of skeletal rabbits.  The Leporids advanced  behind a line of badgers carrying halberds, while the rats appeared to be taking orders from a group of flightless birds.  A rain of arrows fell from the sky, showers sent by both sides.  The gun metal grey dawn soon tinted red as the sun rose, briefly matching the ground now littered with bodies.  Animal cries of agony.  A cold wind frosted the edge of the scuba mask, ice licking at Mitch’s ears as he stared dumbfounded.  

The battle raged for what seemed to be hours.  He didn’t know which side to root for, but stood rapt.  When it finally ended, the rabbits victorious, Mitch watched a pair of squirrels wheel out a guillotine.  The defeated rats got lined up.  A hooded frog operated the guillotine, and beheaded the remaining rats one by one.    

The light faded out.  Mitch went to bed, though he didn’t sleep.  Instead he stared at the ceiling trying to make sense of what he’d seen.  

The next day at work he counted the hours till he went home.  He told no one, and canceled dinner plans with friends in order to sit by the hole.  Night arrived.  Midnight.  The hole glowed to life.  Licking his lips, Mitch put on the scuba mask, and dove into the sight.

An elderly rabbit sat on a time-discolored stone throne.  The high crown on its head, made of woven branches, jewels fastened with metal threads, suggested the old rabbit must be royalty.  Two crows stood before the throne offering a small chest containing an assortment of silver jewelry in ornate Celtic patterns.  The rabbit royal shook its head.  The crows tried to run, but spears in the hands of squirrels soon brought them down.  The royal rabbit chuckled.  The light faded away.

That evening Mitch spent the rest of the night writing down what he’d just seen as well as what he could remember from the previous viewing.

The Crows retaliated against the rabbits, dropping flaming bundles on the Leporid city.  Women and children burned in the streets.  Prince of Hares cut the old royal’s throat then went to a high tower to offer the head as a sign of peace.  Though the crows took the head, they gave no peace in return.  The city soon drowned in blood.  The crows left the city in ash and ruin as a warning to all.  But several rabbits still lived in the rubble.

Mitch found the longer he stared into the hole the longer the visions lasted.  Soon he needed to take time off work in order to keep witnessing events.  Another problem emerged.  Whenever the view blinked out it took longer and longer to return.  A give and take as it were; however, time obviously didn’t move the same for Mitch as it did within the hole.  Whole decades passed as he waited for another chance to peer into this other world.  Mitch did his best to piece together a patchwork history from what little he saw, but some facts would always remain obscure.

Still, he saw the rise of Crows before having to assume their decline into decadence.  The rats returned alongside the rabbits, any animosity a thing of the past.  Another war raged.  This time the frogs and squirrels vied for power, for themselves or at the behest of others Mitch couldn’t say.  He saw buildings one might call churches full of whispering prayer animals.  In a dark alley a mouse gave birth to a small baby, snuck the swaddled infant out of the city to a fox, who spirited the child away to a life Mitch never saw unfold.

Mitch watched it all, and more, and never told a soul.  He suspected no one would believe him – fair enough.  He went to work during the day, and at night waited for the hole to light.  If it didn’t by midnight he went to bed where he dreamed of previous visions.  When the light did shine, though, he spent the whole night staring into it, even went so far as to keep a small tub nearby so he could pee without walking away; built himself a kind of high chair so he could sit and stare.  Mitch watched it all for decades of his own life, centuries inside the hole.  

When he died from a heart attack, somewhere around 69, Mitch lived alone.  People in the apartment building didn’t really know what to think as no one really knew the man.  Having no friends or family, Mitch’s landlord took possession of his few belongings.  Among them the landlord found a series of binders full of pages upon pages of writing along with illustrations, the drawings rough at first but improving considerably in later volumes.  The landlord flipped through nearly fifteen thousand pages, casually reading a line or two here and there.

Chuckling, she said to herself, “Mister, you had one hell of imagination.”

She set the volumes in a corner of her own apartment.  The next day she made arrangements to have the hole sealed in Mitch’s apartment.

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Lovingly Hated

2/14/2015

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This strange little song came about while working on a larger project.  It was originally part of a bigger transmedia undertaking about two people who go into the woods for a romantic weekend, go insane, and end up killing each other.  Hopes are running high that project will eventually come to fruition; however, in the meanwhile, it seemed a shame to keep this creepy number on the shelf.  Combined with more art from Variations on a Theme, this time featuring work related to Children of the Elder Gods, here's Lovingly Hated.
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Why Not?

2/7/2015

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I put together this song the other day, not entirely sure how I was going to use it.  There are two transmedia projects I have in the pipeline I thought it might be good for, however, while working on an art project -- I mentioned it a little while back called Variations on a Theme --  I came up with the series of images found in the video, and they all just seemed to fit together.  Entitled Digital Synesthesia I see some kind of psychedelic binary code when I look at the pictures, though my interpretation shouldn't be the defining characteristic, a border closing off other perspectives.  In any event, enjoy Why Not? and Digital Synesthesia.
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    Author

    J. Rohr enjoys making orphans feel at home in ovens and fashioning historical re-enactments out of dead pets collected from neighbors’ backyards.

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