We here at Honesty Is Not Contagious recently began receiving letters and cassette tapes from notable author Charles Gint. You might recall such Gint classics as The Wet Valley Killing Spree, A Lovely Afternoon Dying, and Go to Sleep So I Can Kill You. Although we did not in any way request these materials, we still feel obligated to present them mainly due to repeated threats from Mr. Gint such as: "I don't want to hurt you, but I will kill you with fire."
So without further adieu, we present Dear Ann along with this letter from Charles Gint, printed at his threat/request.
"Hello, I'm Charles Gint. Thank you for joining me. Today's venture into greatness is a short story entitled Dear Ann.
"Inspired by the works of lesser greats like myself -- Joyce, Jonrosh, and Marenghi -- I've been a writer now some fifty years. I started penning in the early seventies, and since then have blazed a trail through the world of literature that many have since followed. The path I made is not a safe one, but at the end of it is glory, fame; there used to be fortune as well, however, that's easily lost and meaningless! A fair warning. Creepy, Halloween themed ice cream trucks are not a sound investment, nor are drug mules, domesticated squirrels, or children clothes made of asbestos, although one would imagine parents'd be inclined to keep their kids from burning alive, but I digress.
"I've said enough, though I wish I could say more. We'll chat again, soon I hope. When the bottle is open, and the wine flows freely I'll be there because who passes up on an open bar? Not me.
"Sincerely, Charles Gint."
So without further adieu, we present Dear Ann along with this letter from Charles Gint, printed at his threat/request.
"Hello, I'm Charles Gint. Thank you for joining me. Today's venture into greatness is a short story entitled Dear Ann.
"Inspired by the works of lesser greats like myself -- Joyce, Jonrosh, and Marenghi -- I've been a writer now some fifty years. I started penning in the early seventies, and since then have blazed a trail through the world of literature that many have since followed. The path I made is not a safe one, but at the end of it is glory, fame; there used to be fortune as well, however, that's easily lost and meaningless! A fair warning. Creepy, Halloween themed ice cream trucks are not a sound investment, nor are drug mules, domesticated squirrels, or children clothes made of asbestos, although one would imagine parents'd be inclined to keep their kids from burning alive, but I digress.
"I've said enough, though I wish I could say more. We'll chat again, soon I hope. When the bottle is open, and the wine flows freely I'll be there because who passes up on an open bar? Not me.
"Sincerely, Charles Gint."
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